Harriette Cole: I realized the credit card thief was my own son
DEAR HARRIETTE My son has gotten ahold of my credit card information and has been using it excessively and without my permission Related Articles Harriette Cole I keep replaying what my friend commented about my child Harriette Cole Everyone at the dog park laughs when I m disrespected by another owner Harriette Cole I was taken aback when she noted she s surprised I m still married Harriette Cole I m going home to people who think I m a big-city success Harriette Cole He mistook me for someone else a woman I consider obese He is years old He has a job and lives on his own This feels like a violation to me but my husband thinks I am overreacting and that my son presumably thought it was OK From what I ve gathered it seems like he has my information attached to his tap-to-pay because he s used it for in-person purchases This feels deliberate to me He s purchased groceries takeout gas movie rentals and more This feels grossly irresponsible for a young adult I want to cut him off wholly but it s not just about the money What should I do about this level of dishonesty I don t want to treat my son like a criminal but I don t ever want him to take from anyone including me and think it s OK Teach Him a Lesson DEAR TEACH HIM A LESSON Don t assume the worst Instead talk to him Tell him you realize that he has been using your credit card Note the variety of purchases that have shown up on your bill Ask him why he is doing this Listen to his response Perhaps you gave him the number once and he kept it on file Tell him that you no longer want him to use your credit card information without asking you first Remind him that he is a young adult with a job and an independent life If he necessities your help he must ask DEAR HARRIETTE I have never been ghosted like this before and I don t know what to do I was dating a guy for a scant months Things were nice though he was a bit moody and would disappear for weeks sometimes Mainly we talked a lot on the phone and saw each other a couple of times a week We got into an argument a sparse weeks ago and I was sharp with him He got mad that I dared challenge him about his behavior Next thing you know he ghosted me I m pretty sure he blocked me on social media because I see old stuff but nothing new He doesn t call me at all It s like he is punishing me because he was rude to me and I called him on it I know I should just let this go but my feelings are hurt and I can t believe he did that I am a nice person and I treated him well Why would he do that to me Ghosted DEAR GHOSTED This type of thing has happened to a sparse readers who have written in in recent weeks All I can say is that sometimes you won t be able to figure out why people do things especially if they choose to stop communicating with you Related Articles Miss Manners I don t want to be stuck at a party with women who don t like me Dear Abby My daughter has all these rules about my grandson and it s so stressful for me Asking Eric I m banned from their house because of what I disclosed about the kids violent competition Dear Abby Parents cute idea leaves trainer in stressful situation Asking Eric I posted one photo to tell people of my son s wedding and he made me delete it Rather than continuing to wonder and doubt yourself move on Fill your time with positive constructive activity Do your best not to sit around brooding Choose to take care of yourself instead Exercise Eat healthy Go out with friends Put yourself in social settings with other people and decide you will have fun When you start to think about him change the subject in your mind You can do it Harriette Cole is a lifestylist and founder of DREAMLEAPERS an initiative to help people access and activate their dreams You can send questions to askharriette harriettecole com or c o Andrews McMeel Syndication Walnut St Kansas City MO
